The Price is Wrong, Bitch!

So on Saturday I headed back up to El Lay proper from my new edge-of-the-Orange-Curtain abode for a much needed girls night with Alison and Amanda. It's funny, considering that Amanda was Susie's maid of honor earlier this year (they don't speak now) but Alison and I have somehow re-appropriated her as our friend. We felt slightly guilty for hanging out with out Susie, but then when she and Mr. Susie were at Alison and the Future Mr. Alison's housewarming last weekend, she was super awkward and barely spoke to anyone.

But that's not what this story is about. Like any good girl's night/afternoon, we headed down to the Third Street Promenade for a little shopping, mostly required by the fact that I'd packed my fab new Ted Baker silk tunic to wear out that evening, and Amanda only brought shorts and a t-shirt.

As we blazed a trail from the Banana Republic at the north end of the street to the H&M four blocks south, I had my eyes down to avoid stepping on any hippy children or street performing acrobatic children, which is why I saw the young girl in the stroller first. I looked at the child, black curly hair dissheveled, drool dripping from her large, open mouth, and thought how sad, an ugly baby. There is nothing, my friends, worse than an ugly baby. And I'm really not that hard on babies - I would in fact argue that about 99.9% of babies fall into the adorable category - but there is that small percentage that's just weird looking, that you can't in good faith say, "oh, how cute!" without the side of your mouth twitching uncontrollably.

I know Amanda well enough to know that she's often my sanity check on things, so I focused my gaze up to try and catch her eye, since she was walking slightly ahead of me. I found myself looking into the eyes of Billy Madison himself, Mr. Adam Sandler.

And it clicked. The fugly child was his.

It's always eerie to me seeing celebrities in person. It's weird, because they look so much like themselves. That sounds weird, but the way I could describe Saturday's sighting is as if someone had cut and pasted him and his little girl out of People magazine and pasted them onto the scene of my Saturday.

It was only a matter of seconds and they passed us. Amanda and I made eye contact, she gently raising her brows. This is the acceptable reaction, especially when said celeb is now maybe a max of 3.5 feet behind you.

Alison? Not so much.

She pushed between us. "OH. MY. GAWD! Did you SEE WHO that WAS? ADAM. SANDLER."

It was imperceptible, but both Amanda and I started to walk faster. "Yes, and he can hear you. Shh." Bless her heart, she kept going on and on. I silently willed her to lower her voice.

I mean, I'm not enough of an ass to say, "oh, I see celebrities all the time, it's no big deal," because I don't, and it's not. I do, however, recognize the fact that they are indeed real people with real wives and real families. They deserve to walk around a shopping area without people pointing and shrieking. That and I'm sure it's pretty annoying to walk around and have people whispering your name loudly.

I'm able to forgive Alison this because as much as I love her, she's a total nerd. It definitely works for her. It's part of her charm.

But then, it happened again.

This time, we were walking to the car, laden with bags, and turned down the block of the parking structure, passing a gelato shop (or is is "shoppe?"). There was a stray three year old walking in front of me, with no apparent parent in sight. She was dirty and disheveled,  and didn't seem to have a destination or be aware of the teeming masses barrelling down the street behind her. Just as I was about to say something, she veered left sharply, and I heard a familiar voice boom, "You like that ice cream, don't you kid?"

And again, I found myself making fleeting eye contact with Happy Gilmore.

This time we weren't even around the corner when she started. "Did YOU SEE? It was ADAM.SANDLER, again! OH MY GAWD, I can't believe it."

It was awkward. Amanda was the one to say it. "Yeah, Al, and you said it so loud he's now looking right at us. Congratulations." Alison gasped and picked up the pace towards the parking structure, suddenly red-faced, embarrassed at herself. Amanda and I trailed behind, chuckling softly and shaking our heads. 

And the Winner Is...

Thanks to everyone who entered my giveaway! I tallied up all the comments and follow bonuses, and then used the handy dandy random number generator at random.org...

...and the winner is...

Trixie from Swooning the City!

Congrats to Trixie for her big win of a $20 iTunes gift card. Trix, e-mail me (weninlalaland @ gmail) and we'll figure out the deets! :)

And again, thanks for entering and reading and just generally being there, my internet friends. Here's to the next hundy!

Cheers,
Wendy
xoxo

Fun With Google!

Remember it's my 100th post giveaway, and every comment posted between now & Monday counts as an entry. You get extra entries for being a follower, too! :) 

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When I started this blog I, like many of you, installed that wonderful little product called Google Analytics to my site, just to get an idea of who was stepping in to my little corner of the blogosphere. Anyone who has installed GA knows that there is way more data than the lay user would ever, ever need, and sometimes it uncovers some fun little facts.


For instance, since I started this blog, a few people have stumbled upon it using Google search terms like:

"why do I have black bags under my eyes on atkins stage 1"
I don't know, hun, but I use Benefit's Boi-oing! to fix the Samsonites under my baby blues.

"wendy's negative facts"
Come on, I'm not that bad. I'd say I'm healthily upbeat!

"these members did a double take when they saw your profile"
Did they? I hope you have better luck there than I did!


"breasts towered over me"
That's just silly. My breasts don't tower over anyone. I'm only 5-3".

"tenant forgot to forward magazines mail bills"
Several variations on this. Guess I'm not the only one that feels that particular pain. 

And, my personal fave:
"Gay men drive convertibles"
I'll be sure to tell my dad that one. He'll LOVE it.

So, my bloggy friends, what's the best/worst search terms people have used to find your space?  

I Don't Care About My Guilty Pleasure for You

As the cartoon gal Cathy would say, "Ack!" I promised a post a day during for my 100th post giveaway, and it didn't take me long to drop the ball on that one. Oops! Well, guess that just means that you get two today. 

Don't forget - every comment counts as an entry. You get extra entries for being a follower, too! :) That's a follower in the blogger sense, not a follower as in "follow the leader" hah!

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I am so excited for Fall... for no other reason than the return of the regular television season! I'll admit it, I love TV. And no, I'm not some kind of reclusive shut-in-couch-potato-lard-ass, I'm just a normal girl with a DVR (despite what some guy once thought).

It's definitely my guilty pleasure. And I don't care.

The show that I am most excited about this season is "Dexter." Now, I know what you are thinking. Why is a nice, conservative girl like you obsessed with a show about serial killers? I don't know, but I LOVE IT. I crave it. It's one of those shows that I can't wait until the next week, I have to know what's going to happen. I even downloaded the first book on audible to listen on my morning train rides. My dad (who is similarly obsessed with "Weeds," but only because I think he has a crush on MLP) watched a few episodes last year when they showed it on ABC. Now, this was the watered down version, and he looked at me like he was concerned. "How can you like this show?" he asked.

Part of the reason I like it so much is because I loved Michael C. Hall from his stint as David on "Six Feet Under." I also LOVED that show, which if you aren't familiar with it basically dealt with a family of morticians. Someone died at the beginning of every episode, and they'd end up doing the funeral. I also really love "True Blood" and am so sad that it's going to be another whole year until it's back on (btw, Allan Ball, the creator, also did "Six Feet Under").

Might I be crazy? What is this obsession with the macabre?

Anyway, I don't worry too much about how it looks. I love my shows. They're my guilty pleasure. My DVR is rounded out with significantly lighter fare as well - 90210, Gossip Girl, Grey's Anatomy, Greek, The Office, How I Met Your Mother, etc. - but my favorites are always the dark ones.

I also like to listen to dirty, filthy gangster rap when I'm working out. Seriously, the more hardcore the better.

Um, yeah.

So what about you out there? Do you have any guilty pleasures - media related or otherwise? What shows are you looking forward to in the fall season?

Oh, and bonus points (and a bonus entry to my giveaway) if you correctly identify the song that my title comes from. No Google-cheating!

A Hundy!

Dear Reader of Wendy's Adventures in Lalaland,

Today marks my 100th blog post! Hooray! Writing this blog has been a lot of fun. Sometimes I'm better at it than others (I was on fire in May - 20 posts!) but on the whole I think that it's been a positive experience. I've also kept up the whole anonymity thing - which is not too shabby considering I am pretty much an open book!

Anywhosits, I wanted to start by thanking everyone who reads, follows and comments on my blog. It really means a lot to me. I've also been able to reach out and make a few friends out in the internets, and for that I am really grateful.

So, in celebration of my Hundy... I'm going to do my first blog giveaway. I'm going to force you anonymous readers out into the open - muahaha - and reward those of you who frequently show me love!

The prize? One of my favorite things. A $20 iTunes gift card! And, the winner will have the express honor of choosing whether they get mailed a real card or sent an e-gift-card (in case you are anonymous, too, and want to stay that way)! I am very nearly addicted to the iTunes store, so now you can be too.

To enter simply comment on my posts! Each day for the rest of this week there will be a little topic related to my blog post - you can comment on that thread or on something else. Each comment will be an entry. Additionally, if you start following me, you'll get an extra entry. Those of you who already follow me will get two extra entries after your first comment. On Monday, I'll total up all the entries and use the Random number generator to pick my winner. :)

When you win your iTunes gift card, you can buy whatever songs you'd like. My favorites are in the playlist on the right hand side of my page, and what I'd imagine a movie soundtrack of my life might include. Lately, it's felt like the first song on the playlist, "That Green Gentleman" by Panic at the Disco, would be the track over which the opening credits would roll.

So here's today's question, my dears. What song would play with the opening credits in the movie of your life? I'm always looking for new music for my two iPods (yes, I have two) so I'm hoping you'll give me some good recommendations.

xoxo,
Wen

Rant. Don't Judge Me.

I find myself hearing the following phrases a lot lately:

"Don't judge me, but..."

"Please don't judge me if..."

"I hope you didn't judge me when..."

And you know what? It pisses me off to no end! 

Personally, I am one of the least judgmental people in the world. I spent most of my teenage years being unfairly and inaccurately judged by people, and I know how much it can hurt/mess up your life. Plus, according to my own set of beliefs (undefined as they may be), it's simply not my business to judge anyone for their decisions. I really think that the only things I couldn't get past personally were intentional murder/maiming or taking money for sex.

Even taking the comments above not personally, it still pisses me off. You can have an opinion, that is your right. You can even disagree with your friends on one or many points about life in general or theirs in particular, which is also your right. "You choose to do X, which I would not personally choose for myself, and that's your choice." That is not judgment. It becomes judgment when you say, "You choose to do X, which I do not agree with, there for I believe you are a bad person."

Here's an example. I, personally, do not want to live with a boyfriend/fiance/partner before I am married to him. That's my feeling on the subject - being stated in a complete vacuum because I have never been in a position to make that decision. And that's my prerogative. I have several friends who have chosen to move in with their boyfriends/fiances/partners, and I think that's great for them. I don't think any less or more of any of them for making that decision, on the contrary in each situation I've been really happy for them. It's just not something I think I'd like to do. And that should be OK, right? My decision to not make the same decision does not mean I support them any less, nor does it mean I think any less of their character.

Lately I've come to the conclusion that most people use one of the three phrases I mentioned at the start of my post because deep down on some level they're judging themselves for uttering what's about to come next. And I'm sorry - but who gives a flying F? If you can't share things that you're embarrassed/ashamed/nervous/etc. to admit to your girlfriends and expect love and support, what the hell kind of friendship is that?

Anyway, rant over. Just had to get that out. It feels all better now. Don't judge me. Haha!

What little words/phrases/themes tick you off? Please share, so I don't feel so alone. :) Haha again.

But seriously. Me gusta comments.

Getting the Heck Outta Dodge

First Julie. Then Andie. Now, Dylan. There's a mass exodus out of Los Angeles happening in my circle of close friends.

Dylan got laid off the day we were all back in the office after our Vegas trip. At 8 a.m. I got an email with the subject "Wen's Birthday Photos" that ended with "Sending the Vegas photos next. At 8:15 a.m. I got an e-mail with the subject "Sending the Vegas Photos from Home." The body of the message? "I just lost my job."

I wish I could say that she's the only person I knew that this happened to. We all, I think, somewhat naively believed that the worst was behind us. But it wasn't, and it swiftly took one of our own.

I think I knew when I got that e-mail that she wouldn't stay around long. She'd already planned to persue other opportunities when her lease was up in March 2010. I knew in my heart that it would happen, but I selfishly hoped that it wouldn't right away, that she'd stick around because I needed her here.

I read about it on Facebook, no less. There is was in a status update. She was moving home to Atlanta at the end of September. I wasn't surprised, but seeing it in black-and-white made me really sad inside. I knew that she wasn't happy here, but selfishly I wanted her to stay here with me, because I'm not happy here either.

When I talked to her a few weeks later, I got the full story. Dylan's not just leaving the state; she's leaving the country, to move to England to be with her kind-of-boyfriend that lives there.She and her boy have had a two year back-and-forth, which has been hard and gut-wrenching to say the least. But it's no surprise - how much can you commit to someone living halfway across the world? They'd find themselves on different pages, one hurt and mad at the other for crossing some line that hadn't yet been defined, then coming together and resolving the matter and ending up firmly on the same page again.They're definitely on the same page now, and he's come through for her in a time where she needed support the most.

I'm happy for her, for taking advantage of her dream. It's not going to be easy for her to find work over there - then she'll have to get sponsored for a work permit and visa - but I'm trying to stay upbeat for her. I'm envious, not of the fact that she is leaving, but of the fact that she has the guts to do it. Ever since I left London after my semester abroad four years ago, I've dreamed of going back. But I never have.

I don't know why, either. Unlike Dylan, it would be easier for me. I have British citizenship by virtue of being born over there, and could work and live there sans visa. My dad's whole side of the family is over there too, scattered throughout England and Wales, so I'd have a support system. I even have a British bank account. And though for a while, I talked a big game, I never did it.

So for now I'll settle for planning a pie-in-the-sky vacation for when she's settled. I really hope that it works out for her. From what I hear, the job market is the same if not worse in the UK, so I know it's a rough road ahead of her.

And also for now, I've added the London Business School to my list of places to apply in the "maybe" column (yes I have a ridic spreadsheet... more on that later). Sure, our dreams change as we get older, but I know if I jumped in a delorean and went back and asked my 20-year-old self what to do, she'd tell me I was crazy not to at least try.